Personally, we have nothing against a little capitalism in sports. We try to remember that for all the hoopla, this is still an entertainment business, and therefore don't mind occasionally being treated as a customer, rather than a fan, so long as it's not too egregious.
This, though, cannot stand:
This, though, cannot stand:
MLB is trying its hardest this season to associate the joy of a bases-clearing four-run dinger with the horror of a spongy cheese frisbee. We're on the MLB.com site every day and whenever we see "Papa Slam" we are first confused, wondering if they're providing 90s wrestling coverage on the side - and then we remember the marketing tie-in, and all we feel is shame for baseball and the lingering specter of a garlic sauce burp.
Pizza is good. Papa John's is not. It's 3 AM desperation food. It's the lowest possible use of mozzarella cheese, and we're including "erasing pencil marks" and "contractor-grade building material" on that list. There are hundreds of wonderful ballpark foods out there, and if you resort to Papa John's at a baseball game, you have failed at life.
Moreover, if we can't celebrate a delightful grand slam without immediately being forced to consider our society's culinary mortality, we have failed as a baseball nation. Don't do it, America! Leave your pizza coupons uncashed, or better, buy the pizza and mail it directly to Rob Manfred with a demand that he eat every one. This is bigger than steroids, dammit!
Sigh. Anyway, new cards up in the Keepers' Gallery! Thanks to @NoahSheltonOKC, @yoshiki89, @eaphilipp, and @dagdogg for their contributions. Tag those cards #scorekeepersunion on Twitter or Instagram and we'll add them as well!
Pizza is good. Papa John's is not. It's 3 AM desperation food. It's the lowest possible use of mozzarella cheese, and we're including "erasing pencil marks" and "contractor-grade building material" on that list. There are hundreds of wonderful ballpark foods out there, and if you resort to Papa John's at a baseball game, you have failed at life.
Moreover, if we can't celebrate a delightful grand slam without immediately being forced to consider our society's culinary mortality, we have failed as a baseball nation. Don't do it, America! Leave your pizza coupons uncashed, or better, buy the pizza and mail it directly to Rob Manfred with a demand that he eat every one. This is bigger than steroids, dammit!
Sigh. Anyway, new cards up in the Keepers' Gallery! Thanks to @NoahSheltonOKC, @yoshiki89, @eaphilipp, and @dagdogg for their contributions. Tag those cards #scorekeepersunion on Twitter or Instagram and we'll add them as well!
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